“I don’t wanna!”
AKA
“I don’t feel like it!”
The mantra of the ADHD afflicted is easily interpreted as being lazy.
I get it, it FEELS like we’re being lazy!
When it comes to ADHD brains, sometimes we get a brainlock that prevents us from being able to start a task, let alone a project, that we know we need to work on. We’ll take our prescription amphetamine and try again. Infuriatingly, that will often fail as well.
The reason for the ADHD shutdown can vary, but it is typically some variation of overwhelm or executive dysfunction that just won’t let you take the next step. When you hit this state… deliberate, brute force can work, but the results may be mediocre.
At this point, the rest of the world might say that you just need to have “Grit.”
Yeah, whatever dude…
What is “Grit” anyway?
“Grit” is a personality trait, according to Wikipedia. That definition is chock-full of a LOT of information. Let’s go with the three characteristics that Google Gemini shares instead:
Deliberate Practice - This is goal setting, seeking and taking feedback and generally being intentional at improving. See Growth Mindset
Resilience - Being able to recover quickly from difficulties and approach life with optimism and a sense of humor. See Positive Mindset.
Willingness to Step Out of Their Comfort Zones - Doing whatever it takes to get results.
We can work with that, or at least we can figure out parts of it that are ADHD friendly. You might see a trend in these summaries below.
The Good Stuff
Planning & Goal Setting - A good ADHD brain is great at this, so great that it can opt to never actually start taking steps. But you can improve that by building systems with the goal in mind.
Optimism? Sense of Humor? - Definitely in the wheelhouse of ADHD folk. We have it in spades, if we can’t laugh out ourselves, who can we laugh at? A vision of a brighter tomorrow? Also, a common tool in trade. (On our good days, anyway.)
Stepping out of your Comfort Zone - Change, new and novel experiences, this is all about getting away from the status quo.
Competitive - We like to be the first or the best. A great intrinsic motivator
The Less Good Stuff
Recovering from difficulties - This is challenging, especially if you suffer from RSD. It can be overcome, if you can get in the right mindset.
Fear of Failure - Getting out of your comfort zone seems easy, unless you get trapped in the fear that you’ll screw up.
Self-Control or Impulse Control - At any given moment, this can be a problem. If it’s happening while you’re trying to be productive, you could be in trouble.
So, there is a mix of stuff that is built right into an ADHD brain and stuff that we struggle with.
The biggest issue with “Grit” and the ADHD brain is how to have it when you need it.
How Do You Get It?
Grit for the “neurotypicals” is something they can learn through discipline and mindset.
Grit for an ADHD brain is a bit of that, definitely a mindset, but your discipline is something you often need to hack into your life.
As is always the case, a huge helping of ‘self-awareness’ is the starting point. Know your ups and downs, your strengths and weaknesses, and learn to use them accordingly.
You need to learn how to cope with difficulties and fears of failure so that they don’t immediately throw you into a spiral when they come up. Journaling, meditating and mindful activities aimed at helping you understand what affects you and when.
With that information, you will need to use your “up” time to do your planning and goal setting.
From your goal setting, you need to create systems that take you toward the goal and commit to them. That’s the discipline part. Committing to a clear vision and to a repeatable plan of action at the start. Once you’re committing, that plan just becomes what you do.
Sit down,
Start a timer,
Do the thing(s) for 90 minutes.
Take a break.
Repeat (when possible.)
Between 90-minute work sessions and 90 day goal-sprints, you can create sustainable discipline habits that behave like grit.
Questions to Ask Yourself
You might journal about these or just think about them, just explore them.
When am I most productive? Or least?
When do I have the most energy? Or least?
Can I change those by doing something before them? Or with rewards?
What is my relationship with failure, or a fear of it?
How defensive do I get when anyone talks to me about discipline, laziness, or work ethic?
(I find the more defensive I get about something, the more likely it hits closer to home than I like to admit.)
Grit Isn’t Just for the Normals
Recognize that sometimes we’re using different words to say the same thing. Whether it’s Grit or Discipline, there is always a system that can be implemented to make it work for you.
Get out there and get something done!
Such great strategies!
Thanks Jody